too latesaid Lifeyou missedyour chanceand nowyour heartwill foreverbe mineand minealone Elle Vampa There are too many “should I’s” and “what ifs” to know where to begin. Is there a filter to put them in order, I wonder? Then again, would it matter? Should I have dated that one guy I didn’t really like when I … More Bi-Weekly Loss | Goodbye To Love
changeis comingwill pass byand not look twicebefore you retrace your stepsit strikes anew forit is comingaround againchange Elle Vampa Change. It’s making me exhausted. Here’s a list of recent rapid changes: Reading this list back brings back the exhaustion. I’ve got so many plans, emotions and worries, it’s a miracle I’m still standing. But I … More At A Loss For Change
The Day Before The bus is laden with good vibes all round yet I cannot help but stare out of the window, sulking. I thought I’d never need a bib again after my infancy, but here I am: on a bus driving through France, in order to pick one up. One that has my name … More Bi-Weekly Loss | Le Loser En Français
Ideas? Check. Plans? Check. Execution? Pleaso do! Ugh. I’m over this. What is WRONG with me? Is it the hormones again? Ugh. It’s probably the hormones again. I bet the world will stop spinning if that B6 supplement actually works… Ugh. Why can’t I stop saying “ugh”? Ugh. It’s Monday evening and I’ve just royally … More Old Tricks In A New Week
Startled, I stop joining the duct tape and the cardboard box into holy matrimony (“thou shall now forever stick together”) and squint at my boss. A dark shadow figure in an open sunny doorway. “Are you done already with the meeting?” I ask, confused. That was quick! He replies, seemingly as startled as yours truly: … More Bi-Weekly Loss | Failure Included
10 Things I Don’t Dare To Tell My Parents 1. I am planning to leave youI am sure it’s a silent given in my family: me never leaving home. But… I’ve started looking at places to rent. I know you won’t want me to move (please also see #6).Will not mention until I’ve actually found … More 10 Things I Don’t Dare To Tell My Parents
yearning for freedomsunlight never within reachuntil I let go Elle Vampa Anger It’s burning away inside, like a fiery fuel. Instead of making me feel energized, it’s leaving my soul in ashes, having to make do with running on fumes. How I get by is beyond me. I must be stronger than I give myself … More Bi-Weekly Loss | The Unholy Trinity
Out of nowhere, I flail my trustworthy sword at the unwilling, impenetrable wall and… Break it. This time I actually break it. A little out of breath, but more so surprised at my own actions and strength, I watch the dark blue bricks falter under the impact of the hit. It starts with a crack … More Flailing In Love
tickthe pendulum swingstowardspersonal prosperityandmy heart beatsnothing butsmiles tockno time for lingeringrushingpauses are forgottenasthe swing backhits equallyharsh continuous motionnothing to graspstability just out of touch howeverI can only do so much Elle Vampa I haven’t blogged for a few weeks, which is partly due to being busy (sorry), partly due to the flu (WHY!?), and partly … More Once Upon A Loser In Sweden
I’m not allowed to discuss the exact details of my current misery, bound by contract as I am, until a certain date has passed. After which you will find my story to be a perfect re-election campaign to prolonging my title of Loser Queen Extraordinaire for another lifetime or so. Why do experiences that make … More Bi-Weekly Loss | Something Old, Something New
Elle Vampa 