Elle Vampa

With only twenty minutes to pen down my final suspicions, I have zero time to worry about my turning-more-illegible-by-the-second handwriting.

They’re just going to have to figure it out, much like I had to before grabbing hold of this pen – a gift that I’ll cherish for the rest of my life, if only because I like free things in general and free stationary in particular.

It’s early Sunday afternoon and even after an intense 2.5 days of witnessing 2.5 murders and talking to several potential killers, I have no clue who did what.

I end up blaming a perfectly innocent bystander for poisoning herself to create an alibi (false) and stabbing a coworker in the back after finding out he wasn’t who he said he was (at least I got the motive right), and blame a second person for shooting their cheating husband-to-be (ding-ding-ding!).

And then, just to make sure I’ve covered all potential murder schemes, I add “p.t.o.” to my collection of ink on the front page, and add to the backside: “If all of this proves to be false, it was [guest name] after all.”

Little did I know I was very, very close to solving the fake murder during my Murder Mystery Weekend.

Even littler did I know they were going to read the funniest statements OUT LOUD after enlightening us with the denouement…

But the littlest thing I knew followed directly after they publicly read my backside story for all to enjoy: I was merely one of nine (!) people who suspected the same fellow guest – who turned redder with every page that had her name on it.

When my friend called me last week, in tears, to tell me she couldn’t come along on this Murder Mystery Weekend with me, I felt miserable.

I didn’t want to go alone, meet over 40 strangers and spend a whole weekend with them.

But I did.

And instead of feeling like a loser for getting the murderer wrong, I feel like a total winner.

Not for gaining 40+ friends, because I didn’t.

But for going there by myself, putting myself out there. And in the process, nearly dying.

Not from a fake murder, but from enjoying myself too much.

Here’s to all the fake murderers in the world, my new friends, my old friends, and my renewed self-confidence. But most of all: to breaking personal barriers.

Cheers!